Gossip - not so idle

 When you wrong me

So Nonchalantly
Without a break in your step
And yet somehow I have no right to feel bad

When you judge my way of life
So Mercilessly
Without a thought about your own
And yet somehow I have no right to call you out

When you throw mine under the bus
So Callously
Without a thought about how I always protect yours
And yet somehow I have no right to demand respect

When you manipulate the narrative
So selfishly
Without a thought about the damage it would do
And yet somehow I have no right to even expect the truth

When you become the victim
So effortlessly
Without a thought about how you started the fire in the first place
And yet somehow I have no right to even raise an eyebrow

When you don't care enough
So evidently
Without a thought about how much you have sponged my affection over time
And yet somehow I have no right, even to be silent

When you ensure that all relations snap
So conveniently
Because  if I speak up your beautiful bubble will burst
And yet somehow you feel confident that I won't.

You know me better than I ever did you.
I was your sounding board
I was always on your side
Your willing servant, your armour when it suited you

And that was all I was
It was my fault to think
That in all that I did, so happily
I actually mattered.

Why does this affect me so much?